CHRISTMAS MESSAGE

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2001-12-24

gwynn <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> And a very happy Christmas to all the staff at the Nyamanhdlouvu Cleft
> Stick, for the smiles they have given me........

One or two folk have expressed surprise that there was no Christmas issue of the Nyamandhlovu Cleft Stick and Messenger. The Editor in Chief, Mr Ballpoint Lumumba, has explained that he forgot, because he had other things on his mind. Notably the shapely bottom of Miss Beauty Khumalo, who has just taken up her post as gym mistress of Nyamandhlovu Private Finishing School for Gels (Pvt) Ltd.

Mr Lumumba regrets the omission, because it means that Pres Mugabe will not be getting Gladys Dongo's Christmas Message, which was to be conveyed in the Christmas Issue.

Asked what Christmas Message Gladys was sending to President Mugabe, Mr Lumumba said: "Turkey!"

Meanwhile, intellectuals around the world were also hoping for a wise and thoughtful Christmas message from Professor Isosceles Vilikazi, the well-known Nyamandhlovu-based academic, inventor and political observer.

However, the Prof has not sent a Christmas message this year. He feels that Christmas messages should be light-hearted and cheery, and the Prof has been in sombre mood of late.

Instead, he has gone on a quiet fishing holiday to Gokwe. When it was pointed out that there is no fishing in Gokwe, the Prof explained that he wanted a quiet fishing holiday, and that if he wanted a busy fishing holiday, he would have chosen somewhere else.

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