Dongo vs Fitness Flyer Inc: Out of court settlement

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2000/02/01

It has been reported that the sensational High Court case between Ms Gladys Dongo and Fitness Flyer Inc has been settled out of court.

It will be remembered that Ms Dongo was suing Fitness Flyer Inc for a considerable sum of money because her Fitness Flyer departed from its stationary position, launching her on a breakneck journey from Nyamandhlovu, through the bush to the Falls Road, and thence via Gwaai River, Lupane and Hwange to the border at Victoria Falls, where she collided with a southbound locomotive on the bridge.

Apparently the manufacturers and distributors of Fitness Flyer were extremely perturbed at the sum involved. However, it turned out that the sum was quoted in Zimdollars. After knocking off a few noughts and dividing to convert into real money, they cheered up considerably, and would have paid up without a murmur if someone hadn't pointed out that this would be an admission of liability.

Details of the settlement are not clear, but it is understood that Fitness Flyer will pay Ms Dongo a suitcase full of Zimdollars.

For her part, Ms Dongo has agreed to pose naked for Playboy, and give an interview in which she will attribute her remarkable body to regular workouts on a Health Walker.

Both Ms Dongo and Fitness Flyer are reportedly happy with the settlement,although there is a strong possibility that the manufacturers of the Health Walker will sue.

Footnote: Police are still searching for the bungee jumper who was preparing to jump when Ms Dongo made her unexpected appearance on the bridge. It is thought that, in the confusion, he may have jumped without the bungee.

Vic Falls Police have referred the matter to the authorities further down the river. When asked why they were not taking the matter more seriously, they explained that he was Australian.

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