Morgan Plus Eight
Date: 2000-10-11 00:19:30 PST
Zanu PF Headquarters has reacted in alarm to an
article by Professor
Isosceles Vilikazi, the well-known inventor, academic and
political
observer.
The article, which was published in the Nyamandhlovu Dispatch
(circulation
27, delivery by cleft stick messenger), was based on a headline
in an
influential British journal, which stated bluntly that
"Morgan is
unbeatable."
Professor Vilikazi, who is one of the few people in Nyamandhlovu
who
actually subscribes to foreign journals, has succintly summarised
the
original, providing a telling picture of just why "Morgan is
unbeatable."
Morgan, it appears, is faster than the competition. Morgan has
rugged
lines, a timeless classicism, and a charisma lacking in all
others. Above
all, Morgan has "all the power you could ever need."
ZANU PF has responded by issuing the following shortlist of
candidates to
take on Morgan Tsvangirai in 2002:
Mr Cadillac Mpofu
Mr Studebaker Chirenzi
Mr Maclaren Chinamasa
Asked if this was an admission that Mugabe
won't run, a spokesman said that
the Wheelbarrow Corporation of Zimbabwe (Pvt) Ltd is busy
developing a new
model, to be known as the Mugabe Special. "In the light of
the fact that we
do not expect any petrol to be available, it may prove faster
than all,"
said the statement.
Footnote: The influential British journal that sparked this
political furore is called
"Car" Magazine.