
Breaking News :-)

The Nyamandhlovu Cleft Stick and Messenger reports that a US led air strike
on Harare has failed, with the much vaunted bombers returning humiliated to
base.

Apparently, at the request of one Peter Tatchell, George W Bush had
yesterday afternoon agreed to detach a couple of planes from the main strike
force headed for Afghanistan, and divert them to bomb Harare, because Robert
Mugabe is also a terrorist, and a homophobic one at that.

Crossing the Equator approx 2300 hrs ANC time last night, the planes
searched in vain for Zimbabwe, and eventually gave up and went home.

Zimbabwe Defence spokesman, Mr Broadcast Masungu, explained that the
American aggressors were foiled by a simple but ingenious stratagem:  When
the planes arrived over Zimbabwe, the lights were off.

Although it is clear that this had something to do with things, observers
are sceptical that turning the lights off was some form of brilliant
military stratagem.

A spokesman for South African electricity provider, ESKOM, confirmed that
Zimbabwe's power was cut off for five hours last night because, (as he put
it) "those ZANU fuckers have once again defaulted on their payments."

Mr Tatchell is reported to be most disappointed.

Flight Lootenant Myron Grossbart, pilot of the lead aircraft, said?
"Zimbabwe, Schmimbabwe, let's get on with fighting a real enemy already."

He added that if he was sent to bomb yet another tinpot dictator he would
resign his commission and take up klabberjas.